"These are good times to put down the sword and pick up the pen.”

That was a part of my horoscope for tomorrow, but I think I might adopt it as a more long term mantra.

Writing is therapy for me, whether it is for public consumption or just for myself it is one of the most effective ways I process anything. Conversation can be great as well, but involves another's opinions by default. When I write I am forced to face my own thoughts, my own opinions. These unfiltered snippets reflect me, more often than not I read this stuff back and think “ah, so thats what I really feel about that”. It's a bit like wandering around a new town without a map. Sometimes I wish I were better at it, whatever that means, but this emotion fades quickly. It isn't a job for me, and it is something that I do that seeks no validation. I simply do it because on some levels I have to. There is no real process or method I follow, no deadline, no expectation – it's one of the few things in my life that I do for me and me alone. I am not going to try and come off too detached, I am certainly aware and appreciate that you read these words – but that is not the reason I do it. Lord knows that if it were I might consider that I should give a flying fuck about things like grammar and form and sentence structure... mercifully for me, given my “ability”, I could really care less about any of that.

What I do care about, is that I still feel like I have something to say.

Generally when I write it is based around an idea or concept that starts churning around in my head and will not stop. The best metaphor I can think of would be that it is like having an upset stomach – you ignore it as long as you can and then eventually you realize that you are going to purge. Usually this makes things feel much better.

This also seems to often apply for me when I read back the outcome that is left on the page afterward. (self-effacing tendencies in full swing...)