September Grass

Autumn is my favorite season. Most people find solace in spring, but I am constantly amazed at autumn's ability to make things new. There is nothing quite like feeling summer’s last sunburn meeting the cool of a September night, and realizing that change has ambushed you again. Relationships change, relationships end.....It’s when we move on.

Which, by the way, I suck at.

I swear, I am blind to signs that most people can see coming all the way across town. I rock at relationships beginning... Maybe that isn't odd at all; could be that as time goes on I just stop believing the bs I tell myself, that attachment isn't inevitable, that I won't get involved - the problem is I just can't do those things halfway. At least it serves as a good reminder to just how personal hurt can be. Sooner or later the realization hits; this feeling must have been the goal in the first place... If not, why repeat the cycle? Why not make this time the last time?

Like the poet said: "time may change me, but I can't change time". She is a cruel companion, as relentless as love, as unforgiving as a lover scorned... We are supposed to learn her lessons, to grow, evolve. I was supposed to be better at this by now.